a fire in my soul
by dreamythedark
Summary: Kaneki's always cold. But Hide's warm enough for the two of them


**hi**  
 **i wrote this like...half a year ago?**  
 **for hidekaneweek day 5 (winter)**  
 **and forgot to upload it here...**

 **this is my one actual hidekane fic**  
 **you know, instead of that weird no homo thing i usually have them doing**  
 **so yeah**

 **enjoy**

* * *

Kaneki blows into his hands, watching his breath condense in the freezing air. As a ghoul, the cold doesn't bother him as much as it used to, but it's still unpleasant.

"Kaneki!" a voice calls. "Got 'em."

 _Hide._ He slides onto the bench next to him, shivering when he touches cold metal, even through the fabric of his warm winter pants. "Here. Coffee, black for the weirdo," he says, grinning.

"Your version of coffee is a pile of sugar and cream. Literally," Kaneki retorts. He takes the coffee from him, feeling the hot liquid warm his cold hands. "There's not even enough coffee for it to be called coffee anymore."

"It's not that bad! I just like it sweet," Hide says. "Nothing wrong with that." He takes a sip from his own drink—hot chocolate—flinching when it probably burns his tongue. "Crap— _hot_!"

 _It's only called hot chocolate, after all…_ "You okay?"

Hide nods, panting in an effort to cool down his tongue. "Kiss it better?" he teases, with a playful wink.

"Alright." Kaneki leans over, gently pressing his lips to Hide's. The blond is shocked still for a few seconds, but then he returns the kiss, eyes closing as Kaneki uses his free hand to tilt Hide's head closer.

When they break apart, Hide's blushing all the way down to his neck. "That was a joke..." he mumbles, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I know, but I wanted to. Nothing wrong with that, right?" Kaneki echoes Hide's earlier words. Hide's surprisingly shy about all of this; anything Kaneki does that's vaguely couple-y catches Hide completely off-guard. Kaneki had simply taken his hand when they'd walked into the festival, and Hide had gotten so flustered he'd walked into a sign for a goldfish-catching contest.

(Hide had promised to win Kaneki one, but it ended up with Kaneki catching so many the stall owner kicked them out, not even letting them keep one. Hide was heartbroken.)

Now, Hide buries his face into his scarf, unable to meet Kaneki's eyes. He says something Kaneki can't catch. "Hm?"

"Nothing!" Suspicious, but he'll let it slide. Hide finishes his hot chocolate, now that it's cooled down. "Um, I'm going to buy some food...?" He ends the sentence as a question, knowing Kaneki dislikes even the smell of human food.

But now, he's with Hide. That's a small price to pay if it means he can stay with Hide longer, watch his face light up as he sees all the different types of sweets stall owners have undoubtedly set up. "I'll come with, wait." Kaneki takes a sip of his drink, grimacing. It's clearly made by someone who doesn't know the first thing about coffee.

Hide's grinning in that annoying _I knew it!_ way of his. "Coffee snob."

"This would taste like shit to anyone," Kaneki scoffs. "You want to try?" He holds the cup out to him.

"Nah, I'm good." Kaneki knows he hates black coffee, but sometimes Hide will take it just to spite him. This time is not one of those, apparently.

He shrugs, tossing the cup into a nearby bin. "So, let's go?"

Hide tries to copy him, but his throw falls short. He's forced to walk to the bin and pick up his cup, ears burning in shame. "Damn ghoul super-senses..."

Kaneki wonders if he should point out he doesn't actually have enhanced ghoul senses. But Hide already looks so embarrassed, it's best not to— "Your ears are cute."

"K-Kaneki!" There it is again, the bright blush that always appears whenever Kaneki does anything slightly romantic.

"They're so red." He kisses the top of Hide's ear, then his cheek.

"What's gotten into you, seriously?" Hide...sounds _angry?_

Kaneki immediately backs away. "Sorry, I was just..." _He fucked up. He fucked uphefuckeduphefuckedup_ —

"No, no, it's okay!" Hide reassures frantically, seeing the panic written all over Kaneki's face. "It's just me— _crap!_ " He smacks his forehead in frustration. "I can't _speak_ —"

"Are you okay." Kaneki's a little worried, now.

"Let me try again." Hide takes a deep breath. "It's just...this is our first actual date, you know? And I'm the one who brought you here, so I'm the one who should be..." He takes another breath. "But you're like _this_ —" he illustrates this point with an ambiguous hand motion—"and it's like I'm the one who's completely clueless, y'know?"

Kaneki gets it now, despite Hide's convoluted explanation. "But...you are completely clueless." He doesn't get _why_ , though.

"Hey! I resent that." Hide's back to joking; a good sign.

"It's just the truth. It's not like you have much prior experience."

Hide ponders Kaneki's statement, finding no way to dispute that. Reluctanly, he admits, "College kills all my free time, man."

"That's it, then. You can't really expect to be amazing at something you haven't done much, right?" _Not that that stops Hide, but still._

"I guess," Hide says. "Wait! When have _you_ gone on a date, like _ever_?" Other than _that one time_ is implied.

"Um." Kaneki hadn't thought this through.

"Ah." Hide's gone quiet. "So it's just me, then."

Hide is actually worried about this, Kaneki realizes. About being _charming_ or something. _Of course, he always overthinks things..._ "Hide, of course it's just you. I wouldn't _want_ anyone else!"

Hide's just staring at him, making Kaneki self-conscious. "What? You knew that, right?"

"Of course! But hearing you say it..." He trails off, cheeks tinged pink. Kaneki smiles; this look is a lot better than seeing Hide so flustered he can't get a word out. "It's different, y'know?"

"Is it?" _Isn't knowing it enough?_

"Yes! Haven't you— _no_." His mouth opens in exaggerated shock. "I haven't said it yet?"

"Said what?" Even though he's used to Hide's peculiarities, there are still times when he gets lost.

Hide just looks at Kaneki with _those_ eyes, the ones that make Kaneki wonder what he ever did to deserve someone looking him with that much adoration. "I love you, of course."

Every thought in Kaneki's head disappears, replaced with something screaming _Hide just said he—_

 _He—loves me?_

The very small, still logical part of his mind says _of course, you've known that already_ , but everything else is singularly focused on those three words.

"Hey, you're blushing." Hide brushes his fingers against Kaneki's cheek. "Cold?" he asks, knowing full well that's not it.

Kaneki avoids the question. "It's winter."

"Okay then." Hide rests his head on Kaneki's shoulder, wrapping him in a tight embrace. "Better?"

It's warm, so much warmer than it should be. _This is how is, to be with someone—someone you love_.

"A lot better." Kaneki returns the hug, feeling Hide melt into him.

 _It's the best feeling in the world_.

* * *

 **that was**  
 **awkward**

 **sorry for the second-hand embarrassment**


End file.
